Descriptive Reflection : Self - Introduction Letter
Subject : Formal Inductory Letter
Dear Professor Brad Blackstone,
I hope you are doing well. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am Mohamed Asyraf, Student ID: 2201298, a student in your Critical Thinking and Communicating Module. Previously, I graduated from Nanyang Polytechnic with a Diploma in Aerospace Systems and Management. Currently, I am pursuing my Degree in Mechanical Design and Manufacturing Engineering at Singapore Institute of Technology.
I am writing this email to you to introduce myself and some of my traits and goals for this module. Seeing my father troubleshooting his spoilt game boy with a soldering iron made me curious and gain interest in engineering. As time goes by, I also realized that I was doing well in mathematics and physics compared to other subjects which eventually grew my interest in engineering even more.
One communication strength I am an active listener. I pay attention to the speaker and ask clarifying questions to demonstrate interest and understand the speaker better. During my National Service, I had to check on my trainees individually to get feedback on the training. One communication weakness I often face is a lack of confidence. Since young, I was not doing well in my language therefore I tend to get nervous and stutter during presentations or communication with a large group of audience.
My two specific goals I hope to achieve in this module are developing my confidence and to be an eloquent speaker. I believe by achieving these two goals I have, I can communicate effectively and lead my team to success under my guidance.
What differentiates me from others is that I am not afraid to start and carry an informal conversation with strangers to make the setting less awkward. With this trait, I have made plenty of friends throughout my life journey and also learned from them.
To summarize, I look forward to enhance and improve on my communication skills under your guidance and completing this module with a good grade.
Best regards,
Mohamed Asyraf
Hi Asyraf, I appreciate the introduction letter. It is simple yet informative. There are some issues with some tense being used, but overall a well-put-together letter; I can see that you elaborate your points well.
ReplyDeleteHello Yeow Min, thank you for taking your time to view my letter. I will take note of the pointers you have mentioned and improve on it! :)
DeleteWell written and structured letter! I like the reason you gave which made you gain an interest in engineering. Some grammatical errors in the letter but I'm sure it can be improved after reading through again. Overall and interesting read.
ReplyDeleteHi Vernon, thank you for your feedback. I will make sure to proofread my letter in the future. Have a nice day! :)
DeleteThere is a smooth flow to the statement which the reader is able to understand without interruption. Pleasant reading when looking through asyraf's email. Language use was easily understandable. He display a good organisation skills which will help him in the future. The content is really good to a point that I feel I know Asyraf well. Overall, he did a good job.
ReplyDeleteThank you Irsyad for taking time from your busy schedule to view my letter. I appreciate your kind words, Have a great day ahead. :)
DeleteDear Asraf,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this informative letter. It's interesting for readers when you share about your dad's handiwork as an inspiration for you studying engineering as well as your self assessment of your comm skills. It's good to see you reference your NS experience when you mention active listening, but I wonder what you're referring to when you state that you "had to check on my trainees individually to get feedback on the training." More explanation here might have made this anecdote more complete for the story.
In terms of English language, while you show good fluency, there are a couple areas in this letter you can improve:
1. some issues with capitalization
-- ...in your Critical Thinking and Communicating Module. > (all capped?)
-- ...with a Diploma in Aerospace Systems and Management. > ?
-- ... Currently, I am pursuing my Degree in Mechanical Design and Manufacturing Engineering.... > ?
2. verb tense issues
-- As time goes by, I also realized that.... > (tense inconsistency) ?
-- One communication strength I am an active listener. > (missing main verb) ?
3. punctuation/sentence structure
-- ... I was doing well in mathematics and physics compared to other subjects which eventually grew my interest in engineering even more. > (missing comma)
...I was doing well in mathematics and physics compared to other subjects, which eventually grew my interest in engineering even more.
-- I was not doing well in my language therefore I tend to get nervous and stutter during presentations or communication with a large group of audience. > (run on sentence) ?
I look forward to hearing more form you in class this term.
Best wishes,
Brad
Dear Professor Brad,
DeleteThank you for evaluating my letter. Your comments has helped me further understand better and realise my mistakes. I will take note of these details and improve in future.
Regards,
Asyraf